People have been using body language for generations. It’s one of the most powerful ways we communicate. Without saying a word, we can appear receptive, guarded, or indifferent. Often, we do it without even realizing it. In fact, what we say with our bodies is usually more reliable than the words we speak. It’s an instinctive reflex that exposes our thoughts.
So, if we’ve been doing it since the dawn of time, why are we so bad at it when meeting the opposite sex? Millions of men and women use body language poorly. In today’s post, I’ll give you a quick guide to “speaking” body language like a pro.
“Are You Looking At Me?”
If you’re interested in someone, look at them. Whether you’re standing across a crowded room or sitting right in front of the person, eye contact is a sign of interest. Of course, that doesn’t mean you need to stare at them relentlessly. But, by casually holding the other person’s gaze, you’re encouraging openness, honesty and the fact that you want to hear what they have to say.
What you do with your hands while you’re on a date can communicate volumes. You may not realize it, but your hands could be telling the other person that you’re not interested. For example, if you stick your hands into your pockets or tap them incessantly while your date is talking, it tells them you’d rather be elsewhere. Open hands are inviting to the other person. It lets them know that you’re interested in what they’re saying and want to get to know them better.
Making physical contact with the person you’re interested in isn’t for the faint-hearted. Even guys and gals who date a lot and are confident with the opposite sex lose their nerve. However, a light brush of your fingers against the other person’s arm or knee can “speak” louder than a bullhorn. It doesn’t have to be obvious. Reaching for your drink can lead to a casual “accidental” brush against the arm. Physical touch has always been a potent communication tool. When you’re dating, there’s often no clearer way to send the signal that you’re interested.
Guys, Gals And Their Tells
While much of the body language used by men and women is similar (eye contact, smiling, etc.), there are differences. For example, a lot of men show their interest in women by their posture. They stand (or sit) up straight. Sometimes, men will throw their shoulders back. Women, on the other, have a few of their own moves. They’ll lean in toward a man when they’re interested. They’ll play with their hair or even play with a straw or other object.
A lot of our body language is involuntary. It happens without our even realizing it. With attention and practice, you can refine the signals you’re sending to the opposite sex. Once you’re sending the messages you want, you’ll notice that dating becomes much easier.